Feeling down

Sometimes it's very hard for me to go on, the bullying I've been through has changed the person I am and made me into a person I can hardly even recognised anymore. I do things, think things and feel things that usually would be alien to me. Sometimes, I can't even control myself and I get out of control. And I do things, thing I usually regret afterwards. I don't understand, I try to, but it's hard when there's no one there to help you along.